I saw ass and titties

Saturday, February 26, 2011

This weekend is going to be about me and its going to be fun, I tell myself as I pour myself a screwdriver. This week was hard because my mom won’t leave me alone. I have spent the past weekend with the Ferrazes and I will spend this weekend with them, too. I have been steadily looking for a job, applying online to major corporations and each application takes me at least 30 minutes to fill out. For the communications manager position I applied to at M.D. Anderson Hospital, I also had to fill out a 5 part test containing 200 questions each. It was a hard, long week. I finally told my mom to back off and if that she continued to push me, I was a shove away from being committed. Not exactly true, but that’s the way she’s making me feel. I want to make my own decisions accomplishments because when I overcome this and am at the top again, I want to be able to say that I did it all on my own; not, my mom made me do it. I deserve a fun weekend, I repeat to myself.

The only day I am allowed to sleep in is Saturday mornings but since my mom leaves the house at 8 a.m. to go to yoga, I am usually awake. She doesn’t arrive back home until 1 p.m. and I was not waiting around until she got home. She was upset last weekend when she returned home and I was at Elijah’s birthday party. I had told her where I would be. One o’clock came and she wasn’t home so I went to the party. UGH! White people have it so easy. They could live with their parents forever and they probably wouldn’t care. Not only do they not care if their child has a drinking or drug habit, most of the time they financially support it. They can sleep whenever and come and go as they please. Must be nice, I looked down at my drink. In my next life, I want to be white.

I text Gabby and she doesn’t answer so I text my cousin Daniel and we hang out at his place. I meet his neighbor Terry, we talk and Lito comes over to buy from Daniel. We smoke together, laugh and Lito leaves. I was feeling good. I was worlds away from my mom and it felt great not to care for just that short time. Daniel’s sister, Ariana, came home from work and we caught up. We fell off because she was supposed to come to our New Years Eve party and she blew us off for her boyfriend, like she always does. I had made plans to see Hall Pass with my brother, Lucas, and I pushed them back an hour so I could catch up with Ariana, or as the family calls her, Mama.

I meet Lucas and Larissa at the movies. I’m sure they were bothered but they were a 30 minute drive away. I did my best. Hall Pass was not worth it. Wait until video, guys. We leave and can’t figure out what to do. Lucas says they’re going to my sister, Gabi’s, house to have dinner with my dad and uncle. Out of a lack of plans and sheer guilt from my brother, I decide to have dinner with them at my sister’s.

Things went better than I thought. Everyone was rather pleasant and I convinced my niece, Isabelle, to spend the night with me. I texted my brother-in-law saying that since my brother, Daniel had Christopher, and I had Isabelle, they had no excuse not to have sex. He laughed and said we’ll see.

I take Izzy to pack her overnight bag and make plans for our sleepover and walk her back to the kitchen.

“Look, Tina! Nick has naked pictures of girls on his phone!” Paul laughs, showing me Nick’s phone.

AWKWARD.

“I saw ass and titties! Whoever was in those panties has a nice ass!” said Lucas.

“That’s not Nick’s phone! THAT’S MY PHONE!” I yell at Paul and Lucas.

I glare at them furiously. I watch the realization of who they saw pictures of painted across their faces. She had sent me naked pictures the night before and of course, I had taken pictures of myself to send back to her.

“Wait … so who were those girls?” Lucas asks quietly.

“I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I’m so sorry. I am so sorry. I’m so sorry. I just saw this phone on the counter and I thought it was Nick’s. Your cases look really similar. I just thought it would be funny to look at his pictures. I am so sorry. I am SO sorry,” Paul puts my phone on the counter and back away slowly.

“I’m not telling you who the girls were, Lucas.”

“There were two different girls in there,” he says questioningly. God, Lucas. Seriously, stop smoking weed. It’s killing your brain. You just said your sister has a nice ass. EW! My brother just saw my ass and saw her boobs. How does this happen to me?! Shit like this always happens to me.

I leave and go home. There is nothing else I can say. Really, it’s hilarious. They saw what they saw and I can’t do anything about it. Hope they enjoyed the show.